Aftermath

Eyes closed, wrapped in a warm blanket of feelings.

Eyes open, the cold reality slams into my limp body like a wall.

One foot, then the other, slowly, shakily stepping back into the world I once knew,

A dull heat spreads through my body, replacing fear with insecurity and doubt.

How could I believe I could do this? Why is the sun so bright?

Clawing my way out from under my rock of powder and green,

The home I made and bed I lay for too many years.

Euphoria became a chore, all I ever needed was more!

My bed turned to nails, my home a dungeon.

I was my own dungeon master, blocking my escape by my petty, weak, needs.

Every day is a struggle, I wish I could live in a bubble,

The face in the mirror isn’t me, I wish I could just be free.